four years ago, when i attended the whole-istic woman class taught by my then-stranger-now-dear-friends amy and julia they planted a seed. perhaps it was good it was that long ago, because it's been a long time pushing up out of the soil. but, i think it might be ready soon and perhaps just in time.
they spoke of a new (to me) way of discussing and celebrating womanhood--and specifically, the part that stuck with me, a young woman's first menarche. they suggested perhaps gathering 'wise women' in the young woman's life for a celebration. making this an event that the girl is looking forward to.
at the time, i felt like i needed to come to peace with my own thoughts about menstration and womanhood before i could pass it on in a positive light to my daughter.
i also realized, this morning, that i needed to come to peace with my own thoughts about motherhood as well.
i feel like this peace about motherhood (and more so about homemakinghood) has kind of been a long time in coming and things for me have just been starting to click in the last couple of months. little glimpses and insights building up. just yesterday, i was sitting on the hard blue bleachers watching skyler's basketball skills class. for some strange reason it is one of the most relaxing things i do in my week, besides meditation and long baths. i looked up and saw that tall almost eight-year old in his bright fluorescent yellow shirt and thought i gave BIRTH to that kid. and look at him making three-point baskets. and then a wash came over me, "he is your most beautiful creation." (i'm sure that thought applied to all my children, not just the one in slightly too-big hand-me-down silver basketball shoes). perhaps i have had hundreds of other similar confirmations, and i wonder sometimes if there is one that finally reaches the 'tipping point' of believing and hoping and remembering some of the times to a deep all-the-time knowing.
i feel in that firm knowledge i could be in a better place to teach my own daughter about womanhood and motherhood.
this very thing has been on my mind this week.
this AMAZING (one of my very favorite things ever) post "Why Being a Mom is Just as Cool as Being Harry Potter" might have sealed the deal and given me a beginning of how i would like to start bronwyn's book--that motherhood is the most powerful enabling and protecting love in the world.
"I think that sometimes I feel so unimportant in the whole big drama of the world, and I feel helpless and powerless to make a lasting change for good. There are times that my mothering and my efforts to love and nurture others seems like a royal waste of time and talent. Yet then I think back to Lily Potter and Molly Weasley [mothers in Harry Potter] and see how, between the two of them, they took down the two most evil forces of their time. Their story reminds me that even though I might not look like anything special, in my heart there is real power. I have shown my willingness to die for others, and that is a power that protects and enables. I have the power of a mother’s love, which might just be the most powerful type of magic there is.
So watch out."--Heather Farrell
brainstorm:
--my meditation-retreat-friend lani put together a book for her daughter, called "we are daughters" and was kind enough to send it to me when i emailed her. i think it is a really great starting point for me to start thinking about some other things i would love to add to it. i am really grateful she was willing to share and write about it.
"The path of womanhood (and the womanly cycle) is certainly a balance of sorrow and joy, life and death, pleasure and pain, but I want them to move forward into that future confident in their ability to weather those highs and lows with grace, surrounded by support from the people who love them. I want them to hear from their female elders: You are no longer a girl. You are a woman. Welcome. You are strong. You are brave. You can do hard things. Impossible things. Beautiful things. Magnificent things. Powerful things. Rejoice!"--Lani Axman
--i have been thinking about this idea from 'nienie' since she originally posted it about a year ago. a collection of letters from relatives. wouldn't it be wonderful to have a collection of letters written to you--maybe saying something about the girl, and some thoughts about motherhood and womanhood and all matters of awesomeness. i have loved this idea since i saw it. but, i missed it for bronwyn's 12th birthday and then i thought maybe for her sixth grade graduation. but, now i'm thinking that would be an amazing thing to receive as a gift for a first menarche.
--a gift of a charm bracelet with a charm and colored bead for each value. what if we went over one story each week (or month) and a charm was added to the bracelet, now in preparation. i LOVED my charm bracelet and still treasure it.
--i also love the idea of this necklace. bronwyn gave me a beautiful tree necklace last year for mother's day (because of my love for family history). i love the idea, over and over, of connecting to our past mothers, other mothers in our relief society family, and other mothers and women in the scriptures.
please share any thoughts so i can add them to my brainstorm!